Dear exam,

Exams are driving me so crazy that I am writing a letter to exam to get over my frustration.

Dear Exam,

                   This is to inform you that you need to die soon. I wish I was one of the Gods who could give you a shrap* and condemn you to hell. I’d love to make your pakodas** and fry you in hot oil. I hate you. You are the most frustrating, merciless, irritating thing I have come across (after the scrappy sister). You are worse than Hitler, Gabbar, Mogambo,Kancha Cheena,Shakaal, Rafal and Voldemort. All students hate you dude! Don’t you feel ashamed? Go into hiding!

You are like trial by fire. You are like the horrible movie Happy New Year. You are like a saas*** and we are the bahus****. If we students find you some day, you will be murdered brutally. I am giving you useful advice, hide somewhere and leave us alone.  You live your life and let us live ours.

I just want to ask you these questions:

• ·       Do you want to study about the latitudinal extent of the non-existing Lilliput island?
• ·       Do you want to study for 10 hours a day?
• ·       Do you want to study 4 and 3 subdivisions of 2 subjects and mix them up in your head?
• ·       Do you want to sacrifice your favorite “Torture” show for yourself?
• ·       Do you want only an hour's sleep a day?
• ·       Do you want to dance and look like a psychopathic patient affected by you?
• ·       Do you want to sing exam anthems?

I am sure the answer must be no. Just accept the fact that nobody likes you and just get a spaceship and run away to Mars!

Run or die.

Tortured and sick of you,

Aastha

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*shrap- curse

**pakodas- a fried indian delicacy

***saas-mother-in-law

****bahu- daughter-in-law