Exam fever

Sorry, sorry , sorry. I didn't post last week. Exams had entered my sorted and composed life. My brain had stopped working. Ho sake to maaf kar dena*.

I was going to post an article "5 devices a student desires during exams" (coming up). But a comment from one of my friends changed this whole topic.

Exams are like Masterchef Pressure Tests, Agni pareekshas**, those "nahi-nahi-nahi***" moments in daily soaps, tragic ends in books,scenes when the hero is in danger in movies. Exams are somewhat like sweet and sour soup. If the go well, they are a sweet as rasgullas **** and if go bad, they are as sour as lemon. You can call them biryanis *****too. Like biryanis are a combination of many spices, exams are a combination of many emotions. Exams are full of pressure for some and a cakewalk for others.

Anyway,lets come back to why I changed the topic. So this friend told me to add a gadget that allows us to cheat. I am an honest person and believe in the satya hi shiv hai ******concept. Don't worry, I am not a philosopher or maryada purshottam ram*******. I am proud of my ideals and follow them.

So let me talk about this whole "cheating" concept. Many readers of this article must have cheated at some point in their lives. But lets mend our mistake. Jo beet gayi so baat gayi********. 

-Why do we cheat?The answers simple. Pressure. Pressure form teachers,parents, friends to perform well and get good marks is the reason. We have a pile of portion which is as high as Mt. Everest, so at times not completing it might also be the reason.

-What does cheating do to us?Cheating makes a person like one of those shady characters like Sherlock Holmes. The person depends on cheating to pass and score better. Cheating makes them "over-chilled" about an exam. They think that exam is their baaye haath ka khel*********.

-Why is cheating is the worst way to score marks?I know that a person feels like pressure-filled pumpkins before an exam. But cheating isn't the solution. It makes the person vulnerable to bad company. The guilt to do something bad and that pinch of fear becomes invisible. We have fear in us, but the evil streak of being a cheat conquers it.

Cheaters have the caliber but they are so stuck with cheating (Fevicol ka jod hai**********) that honesty seems impossible. Cheating is hazardous for the future too.

So guys just remember, cheating is a disease with no cure but quitting. Cheating leads to nothing but failure and bad deeds. SO STOP CHEATING AND START LEARNING!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*Ho sake to maaf kar dena- please forgive me
**Agni pareekshas- trial by fire
***nahi-nahi-nahi- no-no-no
****rasgullas- a Bengali sweet
*****biryani- a rice-based dish
******satya hi shiv hai- truth is God
*******maryada purshottam- rule-abiding
********jo beet gayi so baat gayi- forget the past
*********baaye haath ka khel- cakewalk
**********fevicol ka jod hai- inseparable

The lamp of nationalism

15^th August, 1947: Faces glowed with smiles, people danced with happiness. They were proud; they were citizens of the Independent India after all, they were proud to be citizens of the country which gave them so much, they were proud to hoist the tri-color, proud to sing Jana Gana Mana, which spread a smile on their faces each time they sang it. The only religion was Nationalism, the Gods were the freedom fighters, and the National Anthem was the bhajan*, with pride the Prasad**. They had never experienced this emotion, this emotion of being proud Indians, this emotion of hoisting the National flag and singing the song they longed to sing. The lamp of nationalism glowed  bright red.

15^th August, 2016: “Urgh. It’s Independence Day. The same boring National Anthem. Can’t we sing One Direction’s Best Song Ever instead? This song is so boring. And then those three colors, I feel so ponderous when I look at them! Why does this day even exist? We have the same thing always, that stupid national anthem, those three colors are shown, some people do some march past to show their “pride”. What pride? What has this country given to us? Apart from bloody roti subji, horrible history, roads on which even a mouse falls, stupid politicians, what are we? A cultured, developing country? I am just waiting to grow up. Then I will leave this dreaded nation and go the heaven of USA.” This would be an extract from the diary of a person of today. Apart from insulting this country of ours, we don’t even know two plus two. The lamp of nationalism has been extinguished long back.

I just mean to give a small message through this article, don’t celebrate Independence Day just for the sake of it, show some respect to this beautiful country of ours. Show that pride our ancestors had. Let the lamp of nationalism light again. Let the pride come back again. Let us be proud Indians, and long to escape to the “heaven” of USA. Let’s make this lovely country of ours better than heaven!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*bhajan- devotional song

**prasad- offerings of God

डायरी एक रूढ़िवादी महिला की

भारत एक बहुत विविध देश है. हम सभी हमारे जीवन में अनेक तरह के लोगों से मिलते हैं. पर क्या आपने कभी इनके भावों के विषय में विचार किया है? मैं किया है. तो आपके सामने प्रस्तुत है विचार एक रूढ़िवादी यानी conservative महिला की डायरी. मज़ेदार डायरी है ये.

हे राम! कैसी आफत है मेरी बेटी ! ऐसा लगता है कि समुद्र मंथन में जिस प्रकार राहू ने धोखे से अमृत का एक घूँट पी लिया था, उसी प्रकार इसने भी पापों के अमृत का पूरा लोटा पी लिया है. पापों की मंडी, आफत की पुडिया, निकम्मी, संकी, संस्कार न समझने वाली, मॉडर्न बनने का प्रयास करती रहती है, भारतीय है या फिरंगी? ऐसा लगता है फिरंगी जब भारत छोड़कर गए थे, तब इसकी परवरिश करके गए थे.

ये सब छोड़ो. आज प्रतिदिन की तरह मैंने जल्दी उठकर स्नान किया और प्रभु को गंगाजल चढ़ाया. ये आफत लक्ष्मी तो आठ बजे के पहले बिस्तर से हिलती भी नहीं. इतनी देर सोकर थक नहीं जाती? मैं बार बार इस मनहूस के बारे में क्यों बात कर रही हूँ? इतना तंग करती है, मैं भी क्या बताऊँ डायरी जी! आज इसके वो पीरियड्स भी चालु हो गए. थपड खाया मेरे हाथ से! पागल लड़की भगवान के सामने जाकर प्रसाद खा रही थी! शर्म और लज्जा नाम की कोई चीज़ भी होती है क्या?

चलो बहुत हो गयी बुरी बातें. अब मेरे लाडले सुशांत की बात करती हूँ. मेरी आँखों का तारा, मेरा राज दुलारा बेटा कितना प्यारा है. सब बात मानता है. लड़कियों से दूर रहता है. रोज पूजा करता है. रोज लक्ष्मी से पहले खाना खाता है. उसे समझाने का भी प्रयत्न करता है, पर वो कमबख्त है कि समझती ही नहीं! अंग्रेजों की बेटी.

कल साहिबा मॉल में शॉर्ट्स खरीदने का ज़िक्र कर रही थी. क्या उसका दिमाग लधाक गया है? एक लड़की इतने छोटे-छोटे, एक साल के बच्चे के नाप के कपडे भला कैसे पहन सकती है? हमारे परिवार में ऐसे संस्कार नहीं हैं . पर इनकी (पतिदेव) की भी ये लाडली है, तो अब राजकुमारी सा “शॉर्ट्स” पहनकर घूमने जाया करेंगी और मेरा मुहँ काला करा करेंगी.

आजकल की लड़कियाँ खाना बनाना कम, डाइट करना ज्यादा जानती हैं.  साड़ी पहनना तो दूर की बात है, जीन्स भी पहन ले तो काफी है.लडकों से बात करना छोड़ो, ये तो उनकी गर्लफ्रेंड बनी फिरती है. संस्कार कम, अंग्रेजी ज्यादा जानती है. आप ही बताइए डायरी जी, अब इस देश का क्या होगा?

The cartoons in our lives

Hello guys! Friendship day is here! Time to greet old friends, make new ones and celebrate this day! I too am celebrating this lovely day by giving a tiny gift to my beloved friends. I am converting them into cartoons! Well, friends are like cartoons, but the fun of relating them with actual cartoons is really fun. So let’s get started:

1)    Sophie of Woods Beyond: The Dean of the School for evil, Agatha and Tedros’s best friend, Sophie from the School for Good and Evil will soon feature in a DreamWorks film. It goes without saying, I am Agatha and my pyari Annie is Sophie. Our friendship is eternal like that of Sophie and Agatha.

2)    Hello Kitty: This sweet, soft-spoken, sharing, caring, loving character is just like my best buddy Maha. I don’t know how tasty Hello Kitty’s Tiffin is, but Maha’s Tiffin is heavenly. 

3)    My minion! Needless to say, this cute, little cartoon resembles Sid. If Sid is painted yellow, it would be tough to distinguish between the minion and him. His glasses add to his miniony look.

4)    Jessie: Who doesn’t remember the bubbly, energetic, always happy Jessie from Toy Story? Vaish is just like her. Full of energy, Marathi and Akshay Kumar, this friend of mine might just star in the next Toy Story movie.

5)    The power puff girls: I too have Blossom, Buttercup and Bubbles in my life. My dear Tanu is just like Blossom. She is collected, organized but still loads of fun to be with. Pallu aka Palak is like Buttercup. She loves sports; she is almost like a tomboy. Bubbles would be Madhura. Always smiling, never lacking energy, sweet, sometimes a tube light, she absolutely fits the description for Bubbles.

6)    Ben 10: The adventurous, alien-turning Ben 10 is just like Dhruv.  I don’t know is Ben 10 likes football, though. Maha calls Dhruv alien, so this idea popped into my mind. I don’t know a lot about Ben 10, but as much I know, I picture Dhruv as him.

7)    Lisa Simpson: My reading buddy, the assistant literary secretary, the bookworm. This is Shreya. We always talk about reading. We love reading. Like Lisa, even she loves reading and is extremely intelligent.

8)    Nobita: Ronit resembles Nobita. He cracks lame jokes, is a bit stupid at times, is lazy when it comes to trimming his hair. He has no Doraemon though (which is a good thing, cause Doraemon is really senseless) [No offence to Doraemon lovers]

9)    Bo Peep: Simple, silent, sweet- natured, gentle, kindhearted Bo peep is just like Isha. Isha is an alter ego of Bo Peep from Toy Story.

10)                      Flora- Beautiful, sweet, calming, altruistic, with very pretty hair, Flora is just like Parnika. She is among the prettiest people I have seen. She is beautiful on the outside and her soul is the same too. She reminds me of all these pretty fairies all girls used to be mad about from Winx Club.

11)                      Susan and Mary test: Scientists in the making, super intelligent, responsible and mature sisters of Johnny Test are absolutely like Dibya. I wonder if they would have ever eaten khakhras, because Dibya brings khakhras which are absolutely delicious! Dibya has the brain of both these supernaturally intelligent girls.

I would have wanted to add a couple more, but this article has a limit. I hope you guys enjoyed reading this article. Friends are the most special people on this planet. Cherish them and never forget them. HAPPY FRIENDSHIP DAY EVERYONE!