The Indian killing machine

I have been obsessed with Adolf Hitler lately.  I was introduced to Hitler in the second chapter of my History textbook this year. I was in awe of
 the aura of World War II. Everything about the war fascinated me, but this monster called Hitler has been draining all my energy for the past few months. All I can think about is possibilities of different Hitler theories. I guess the thing that fascinated me the most about Hitler was this question: How did an aspiring artist turn into a killing machine?

For the past few months, I have been reading Mein Kampf and Hitler’s last day: Minute by minute. Apart from this, I Google every new thing I discover about Hitler. I aspire to be a historian, and this takes me closer to my goal.

So all this research work led to the birth of a crazy thought: What if Hitler was Indian? My previous article on such lines, ‘What if Greg Heffley was Indian?,’ was appreciated by a lot of people. So why not bring out the crazy possibilities and change in the course of history if the most famous killing machine of all times is turned Indian?

Historically, if Hitler was an Indian, India would have a conflict between two personalities with extremely different views. Our Bapu would have non-violent, equality, truthful views, but Hitler’s views would be full of inequality, racism, violence, etc. So historically if Hitler was Indian, it would be tough for India to get independence.

Now let’s come to the imaginative part. Just imagine Hitler in kurta-pyjama with a teeka on his forehead. I was just wondering, if Hitler became popular, he’d start a brand. Perhaps, like Patanjali, we would get Nazi dant kanthi. Just think of Hitler speaking Hindi and endorsing his brand on the radio. His brand, Nazi could be a big hit. He might start speaking at gatherings and perhaps become a philosopher. He might make some Indians embrace Nazism.

Hitler, as a popular Indian, he might surely be a part of a Bollywood film or Hindi daily soap. We never know, Hitler could be a superstar like Raj Kapoor or Rajesh Khanna!

Hitler might also turn into a baba like Baba Ramdev. Just think of him with a long beard, saffron robe and chest hair with a packet of Nazi noodles in his hand.

It was Karva Chauth last week. All I could do is laugh as I imagined Eva Braun keeping this fast. Braun married Hitler just a day before they both committed suicide on 30^th April, 1945. But they were in a relationship for 14 years. So I wouldn’t be surprised if my history textbook would have a picture of Eva Braun in a saree waiting for the moon to appear and later doing Hitler’s puja with Nazi agarbatti and Nazi kum-kum.

I am sure we all would enjoy studying Hitler’s history if he was Indian, but Hitler was the Fuhrer of Germany. The world hated him. But imagination doesn’t see hatred.  

An Indian Hitler is definitely a crazy idea.

Wings of fire

She looked around,

Eyes gleaming with hope.

She smiled,

As she saw this cruel, iniquitous, malevolent world

For the last time.

She was about to fly,

Her wings of freedom spread,

As she was ready to escape,

This prison of unfriendliness

She felt proud,

To be bold enough

To leave this diabolical world,

This unimaginativeness

 Slowly she began to fly,

Towards liberty

She felt so good,

She could no longer be fooled,

By those wicked villains

She felt happy,

She felt content,

She felt so satisfied

She felt, independent.

Suddenly,

Her wings began to catch fire,

She began to fall,

She began to fail in her motive to escape

She felt suffocated,

She felt claustrophobic

She felt hurt

She fell to the ground.

Her life began to fall in pieces

The wicked villains were ready with weapons,

To punish her for having a dream,

Her wings were cut off,

The fire of independence burnt off

Her dreams were burnt to ashes,

Tears were falling off her eyes.

The happiness, satisfaction, independence vanished.

She was brainwashed.

Her independence vanished.

So did her dreams.

She felt sad for a while,

But then understood it was for her good.

She was a girl after all,

An Indian girl,

She was supposed to sit at home,

Why dream to work outside home? It is the job of men.

Why look for independence? Aren’t we an independent nation?

Why wear modern clothes? They are for men.

Why to fly away from society? A good Indian woman accepts societal norms.

This is what she was taught.

She was denied independence,

Punished for having a dream,

Her world was her house.

Her right to dream was taken away,

Just because she was a girl,

An Indian girl.  

Kaas

I visited Kaas- a valley of flowers last week. I wrote this poem about it:

The colloidal fog particles have merged

With the chlorophyll-pigmented leaves

The sound of beautiful Bollywood numbers

Is bouncing from wall to wall

The fresh, pollution-free air

Is good for the lungs

The view of the streams,

Filled with H2O

Just makes me want to jump

Precipitation symbolizes the Water Cycle

A vibrant biodiversity,

Flowers in million

Stamens, anthers, stems, leaves

All distinct

The chromoplasts add to their beauty

The animal voices

Are echoing in the forest

The bright Sun

Is shining as a star

The pretty Kaas,

Is really khaas.

Modern Gandhigiri

Just don’t kill me for posting late. I was on a trip to Kaas, a flower valley, when this idea came to my bored-with-joblessness-mind. Mahatma Gandhi, lovingly known as Bapu in India is amongst the most powerful personalities in world history. It was his birthday recently and this article is a small tribute to the Father of the Nation.

Who doesn’t know Gandhiji? We Indians know almost every historic detail about him. So I thought of drifting away from the boring, informative articles to a more chilled-out and modern version of a Gandhi article. So this article is basically some feelings I relate with Bapu and their context with the youth’s current lifestyle. (Sounds complicated, right?)

1.   Freedom- for Gandhiji, freedom meant freedom of our nation from the British. But for students, freedom is a long list. Freedom from exams, studies, to play, to read, from parent’s and teacher’s pressure and expectations, to bake, to sing, to dance, to chill out with our buddies is just a mere 10% of this long list. We are more of a we-don’t-give-a-damn-about-the-nation kind of population. Our thoughts for freedom are confined to school and play and hobbies.

2.   Peace- Peace for us? Putting in headphones and hearing 1D, Hardwell, Justin Bieber, Katy Perry or Selena Gomez’s latest track or our beloved Bollywood numbers is synonymous to peace for us. Peace for Gandhiji? It was singing Raghupati Raghav Raja Ram. That shows development. Bhajan to hip hop. Sometimes I wonder, are we from the same country?

3.   Non-violence-This doesn’t feature in our lives. We follow the vo-do-maare-tum-chaar-maaro* policy. Gandhiji was the ultimate idol for non-violence. Are we really his descendants?

4.   Selflessness- Gandhiji did not care about his life while fighting for freedom. He was very altruistic. He was monotheistic, his religion being freedom. We are more under the self-centered category. For example, reading is religious for me, social service or altruism don’t even feature in my list.

5.   Patriotism- Gandhiji and patriotism are synonymous to me. We all are so patriotic that we dream of jobs in international markets (I’m being sarcastic). Gandhiji freed this country for this country to live. But our eyes see just Paris, Chicago, New York and London.

Hope you enjoyed this article. Bapu is the best!

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*vo-do-maare-tum-chaar-maaro-violence