Gazab ka hai din

6.00 a.m.: I wake up after a sleepless night. I have not been able to sleep last night because today is a day that I have been waiting for since the last 4 years. It’s the Teacher’s Day celebration at school! At our school, on every teacher’s day, the students of grade 10 dress up as teachers and enact their roles. I wanted to be a Social Studies teacher since I joined school, but today I have got an even better opportunity- I am going to be the principal of our school! I was overjoyed when I got the news and am now looking forward to going to school and having a gala time.

6.30 a.m.: I was all excited about Teacher’s Day. But now my excitement has died down. I completely forgot the fact that I am supposed to wear a saree today! I am one of those girls who lives more than half of her life in a pair of shorts and a loose t-shirt. I can’t wear a skirt properly, how will I wear a saree? Apart from that, what if the saree falls? And what if I need to use the loo? How will I? How will I walk? What shoes will I wear? How will I eat? There are all these questions in my mind. But then optimism is the key to a happy life. So, wearing a saree isn’t that difficult also.

6.35 a.m.: Maa has invited one of our neighbors to help me wear a saree. Its just dadi who wears a saree regularly at my house, but she isn’t a pro at it. I have just had a head-bath and I was wearing a blue blouse and blue petticoat. But I was feeling cold, so I put on my grey gharelu jacket. So, I am looking like an orangutan with tangled hair, a bear with grey fur and a whale with a bright blue tail.  I am chomping on my yummy cream cheese sandwich when neighbor aunty enters. I look like an idiot.

6.40 a.m.: We start the most dreaded part of the day- the saree draping. Neighbor aunty drapes it and removes it so that there is no risk of the thing falling. I stand like a still yet talkative khamba and let out a few ‘oohs’ and ‘ahs’. 

I am told to change my earrings and put on some make up but I blatantly refuse to do so. I just put on some Vaseline.

6.55 a.m.: We finally finish draping the saree. The Noble Prize in saree draping should be given to Neighbour Aunty and the one for patience to me.

7.00 a.m.: We are sitting in the car. I am clicking some selfies to record this achievement of my life. The scrappy sister’s comments don’t stop. I told baba to drop me today because I can’t go in the bus with this fiddly thing. The kids would start calling me ‘ma’am’.

7.30 a.m.: I enter school. Luckily, I have Divya and Riya by my side who are (like me) trying to adjust to this sadma. We go to our class and find all our dear friends dressed in sarees (girls) and shirt-pants (boys) who look unrecognizable. We basically tell everyone about how ‘different’ they look. Later, we go down for the function.

The Function:

8.00 a.m.: Whoa, this is nerve-wracking. We are all sitting on chairs, and there is pin-drop silence. The term pin-drop silence sounds like some fictional state, but this is the first time we have actually experienced it.

8.05 a.m.: The Function starts. We have a lovely ramp walk with the teacher whose role we are playing today. The fact that I am going to have the first ramp walk of my life, and the fact that it’s going to be with Principal ma’am just makes a shiver go down my spine. But my name is called out. I walk like an inexperienced saree-bearer, struggling with the six-yard fabric, trying to walk without stepping on the long skirt-like saree. After a struggle as grand as the Sepoy Mutiny, I finally reach the podium, and have my first and perhaps last ramp walk with Principal ma’am. I have a broad smile on my face, but my heart has mixed feelings of fear, nervousness, excitement and happiness.

9.00 a.m.: We finish off all ramp walks. The most hysterical one was Bella’s (who is a guy, not a girl as perceived from the name which is a mere pet name). Basically, Bella is this Biology wizard and is mad about Science. He wanted to be a science teacher but ended up being an English teacher. To show his disapproval of the same, he didn’t smile during the ramp walk (smiles rarely in general too, is expressionless). The funny part is that even the teacher didn’t smile. So there they were, sad and depressed mirror images of each other.

9.30 a.m.: The function ends after speeches by Ishika and I.  I am told by my real class teacher (not her student doppelganger) to address the students cum teachers. So I address them and give them some instructions and they just move out to their respective classes after a proper chai and biscuit breakfast.

10.00 a.m.: Aditi (who is acting as the Vice Principal) and I go to different classes to see whether everything is functioning well. We come back with Teacher’s Day cards. I actually have to run (in my saree which almost fell) from some of the classes to escape the children.

11.00 am.: My set of coordinators and I are sitting in Principal ma’am’s cabin. Ma’am teaches me about how the school functions and how the records are kept in the school. She also tells me how all the coordinators work in synchronization to regulate the functioning of the school. We have a small meeting and then we are given lovely donuts to eat. With each bite of the donut, I swallow all the things that I have learnt today and cherish all the memories that I will have from the best day of my life!

11.30 a.m.: Srija and I are sitting in the bus discussing about how wonderful our day was. I tell her about how awesome my day was even though I was scared the whole time about my saree falling. I had experiences that I will cherish throughout my life. I had the best time ever! All the experiences were unique, and the ones that I would never have in my life again.

12.00 a.m.: I reach home and send the saree to heaven (the cupboard). Its going to Rest in Peace. But the memories associated with it will keep floating in my mind forever.