The curse

The bird of happiness,

Which was locked up in the prison of madness,

Has escaped now.

The mind works,

The heart doesn’t,

All the heart says is,

Oh My God!

When will this stop?

Pressure is all that resides in the mind,

And forces us to increase the area of tension.

Ah! My life sucks!

I guess I just have no luck.

The candies have been snatched,

The eggs of happiness refuse to hatch.

Chocolates have melted away,

To enter a stream of melancholy.

The bricks of joy spurn to bind.

Green vegetables have entered this mind.

Exam is a never-ending ocean,

And a student’s mind is one of those infinite boats that float in it.

Exam is a Mt. Everest peak.

A student is that struggling mountaineer who reaches that peak after tons of hard work.

Oh Lord! Almighty!

Even atheists pray.

Please lift this curse and give us some rain,

Some sunshine, some hay.

Some independence,

And the power to survive this exam every day.

 

Dhal gaya din

Getting off the bed in winter is one of the toughest jobs on this Earth. Unfortunately, 5 days of the week are working. So, what is our condition on each day of the week? Let’s find out!

1)    Monday: Dude, nobody really likes you, so just get out of our lives and leave us alone. After a week of chilling out, we’re back to work. We feel as if this Monday is a vampire aur hamara khoon choos raha hai.  Mondays are like green leafy vegetables. We really don’t want them.

2)    Tuesday: Okay week, you have arrived, I’ve started accepting. We are at this stage when we are starting to accept the fact that we’re at work and we really need to gear up and pull up our socks. We are like this pendulum hanging at its mean position, ready to move to the extremes.

3)    Wednesday- Yeah, I’ve accepted it. We’ve finally accepted the fact that the week has begun. It’s like entering a new school and finally accepting the fact that you have adjusted well. Wednesday is the kuch meetha ho jaaye day as acceptance is an achievement and deserves something sweet.

4)    Thursday- You’re about to end! You tell the week that you are pretty happy about the fact that it is about to end. The acceptance that you had the previous day has vanished and formed water droplets. The mind is just waiting for the next day to end so that you can actually stand on the bed and dance.

5)    Friday- You dance to the beats of Thank God Its Friday. You make your hair brush your mike and sing in the most besurili awaaz possible. Your hair looked shabby and uncombed and you’re clad in just your boxer shorts and favorite t-shirt. You eat all the stuff that you can.

6)    Saturday- Tum itna jo muskura rahe ho is the perfect tagline for this day. We dance, party, sleep, eat, watch movies, shop and just go pagal. We watch our favorite Kapil Sharma Show or Bigg Boss or Indian idol or any other show and sleep. Our snores are the loudest on this day.

7)    Sunday- Weekend, I need another day. You really don’t believe how this weekend just evaporated into thin air. You mentally prepare yourself for the next day by eating extra ice cream tubs to decrease your depression.

So this was how condition usually is on each day of the week. Thanks to my lovely friend, Srija who gave me the idea of this article. It’s her birthday today. HAPPY BIRTHDAY PARNIKA SRIJA AKA DORY!!!!! 

The Georgian

I am sitting on a red, old chair with a black folder in my hand and a placard spelling ‘GEORGIA’ . I have been at this place for the past 6 hours. I’m not bored, but extremely excited about what’s coming next. I am carefully listening to each and every delegate about what he/she has to say and am actually noting down stuff.

Have you ever heard a long boring speech? MUN would appear to the world as something similar to that. But to me, it was one of those action-packed, full of masala Hindi film that should not ever end. MUN for me was a concert of my favorite singers, an Assembly of diplomats who were strangers yet known people to me, a collection of people who taught me tons about life.

So, what was this MUN? I didn’t write an entry last week as I was at the Pune Model United Nations. MUN is basically a version of United Nations for students. We are assigned a country and a committee and an agenda. So we had to research and talk.

I spoke for just 2 minutes at MUN. But those 2 minutes were like a dream come true, like floating on a cloud and flying to heaven and like finding bliss. I had researched dozens and it all just evaporated into a 2-minute speech.

I made friends, learnt, spoke and enjoyed MUN a lot. There were 150 delegates in my committee, so there was loads to learn and absorb. The list is long so let’s not get into it.

Have you experienced something that leaves you spellbound and wanting more? Well, MUN was that for me. I watch Quantico every week, and I want more than that one hour of that show every week. So even after 12 hours of MUN, I want more.

I don’t really like McD burgers much, but for MUN I can definitely say, I’m Lovin It!

If you ever hear someone calling conferences boring, tell them to find their way to a MUN. 

 

Jingle bells

Naya Saal

9.30 a.m.: I thought I’d be partying this morning, as it was the first day of this New Year. But 31^st night was kind of pathetic. My scrappy sister, wanted to buy this New Year’s gift, so instead of partying at some cool spot, I was stuck at Phoenix. And you won’t believe for what reason- buying a makeup kit.

I hate makeup. The fact that I used to like this idiotic thing called makeup, and be one of those stupid girlish girls, talking about makeup, dresses and Barbie dolls all the time as a child scares me worse than a haunted movie.

Even I had bought this Faces makeup kit. It expired recently so the scrappy sister wanted a new one. We bought one after like 2 hours of searching. I seriously hate makeup. I believe in the beauty of the soul and so makeup doesn’t work for me.

Also, after we bought this stupid makeup kit, the scrappy sister came home and did her own makeup. I swear she looked worse off than Gabbar Singh from Sholay.

9.45 a.m.: I wake up frustrated and the scrappy sister frustrated me even more by wearing some random old frock of mine and putting makeup on her face. She taunted me by saying, “Learn something from me. Be a girl. “, I give her the I-don’t-understand-your-concept-of-being-a-girl look.

10.00 a.m.: New Year resolutions are the sickest thing about New Year. I came out and the first thing that was asked to me was what my New Year resolution was. I said I don’t really thing have one, cause I know I won’t stick to it. So I thought of suggesting New Year resolutions for others. I think the scrappy sister should take a resolution of keeping her nose into her personal business. Gosh, she has a pathetic habit of listening to others and troubling everyone.

10.30 a.m.: The first day of 2017 is pretty boring. I need to do something! So, I take my dear Huawei mobile. So I start looking at pictures from the past year.’

I think it was a great year. The rendezvous with friends, vacations, school gatherings, birthday parties, writing lovely articles and reading better books, and lovely family time was just amazing.

All my buddies made this year really special and kept my smile alive. I would like to thank everyone for this amazing year. Thank guyz! 

Wishing everyone a very Happy New Year! 

Jingle bells

Christmas has always been a special festival. In India, we are Hindus, Muslims, Christians, Buddhists, Jains and many more. We all live as a big family and celebrate every festival, irrespective of our religion.

I personally love Christmas. I actually know how Christmas is celebrated, even though I am not a Christian, thanks to my dear friend Avi.

Christmas for me has never been about red, green and white clothes or Christmas trees. It has always been about those Christmas parties that Avi used to keep every year.

As kids, I am pretty sure that each one of us had that slight belief in Santa Claus. Our parents left us gifts, and we thought that Santa Claus left those. The man in a red suit and with a white beard was like an angel for little kids. I think Baba Ramdev should launch a Patanjali Santa. If he gets a tond, dyes his beard white and wears one of those Santa hats, he’ll definitely look like Santa Claus.

My Christmas as a child was filled with Christmas parties at Avi’s house. I am pretty sure I can never forget the taste of guava cheese or the plum cake or the homemade chocolates or the cookies which she used to give every year on Christmas. The Christmas parties were filled with food, fun and games. I remember Avi and Oli (her brother) arguing for the choice of song almost every second minute. I remember those boys v/s girls games which were tie many times. Food was always delicious and the sweets to die for.

I was in a convent school for 7 years. So most of my childhood was spent in a Christian school. Our Christmas parties used to be super fun. We used to dance, click pictures and eat. It used to be fun.

This was Christmas for me. I love Christmas. A merry Christmas to all!

Katti-batti

Childhood is undoubtedly the best part of life. Our lives are like cupcakes and childhood is the icing on it. Childhood is all about fun and friendship. Girl-boy, Hindu-Muslim, dark-fair, all were friends. We were not bound in the chains of society at that time and were like free birds flying around and expressing joy at every moment. Friendship was, or perhaps is, that pinch of masalas in a subji (our lives) that makes it flavorful. It is like amrit as it keeps the life in us alive. Our friends are some sort of superheroes who rescue us from the monster of solitude. Friends always give us a shoulder to cry, a reason to laugh and a suitcase of unforgettable memories.

My friends are my life. I love them a lot! So let’s dive into the world of friendship and discover the different stages of friendship we had as kids. So Annie, Pallu,Vidhz,Shapri,Gauri,Avi,Dishu,Maha,Madhu,Shreya,Srija,Soumya,Gullu,Tanu,Dibya,Isha,Sid,Ronit,Dhruv,Yash,Shreyash,my sad unicorn Shruti, Tina,Ila, Wagisha and my dear sis Stuti, this one’s for you.

1)    Stage 1: Mujhse Dosti Karoge? - This is the introduction to the new friend. As kids, we are usually very shy. So we talk in this shy tone and ask the new friend’s name. I remember how I met my bestie, Annie. Our society sandpit has a red slide. The environment was lonely. I was coming down the slide and Annie was coming up. She asked my name and I asked hers. We were really shy at that time so we reluctantly told our names. And that incident began a tale of endless friendship.

2)    Stage 2: Show off! - I made a new friend! Isn’t it exciting? I need to tell the world! As kids, making new friends was a big deal. So, if some kid made a new friend, they would make sure that the world got to know about it. To show off, we used to hold our new friend’s hand and roam the world with them. We would have this expression on our face which would signal the spectator to ‘see’ my new friend.

3)    Stage 3: Katti! - The petty fights during childhood led to katti-batti. We used to fight for any random reason. Friendship of many years, friendship that we showed off was broken in a fraction of seconds due to reasons unknown to anyone. As kids, if I and Annie were left in the same room, we would surely come out with a fight. I remember Avi used to take katti if we asked her to take the den during Hide-and-Seek.  Gauri used to cry like a kid every second minute. She took katti and used to cry even if a person forgot to say ‘hi’ to her. I remember once Gauri and Shapri had pretended to take katti for what seemed like forever. Me and Annie went berserk and forced these dramebaaz to lift the curtain from their naatak. All this definitely sounds stupid now, but that’s how we were then.

4)    Stage 4: Batti! - A smile bloomed on our faces during this stage. A while after katti, we used to take our index and middle fingers, put them together kiss them and join them to the other person’s fingers so that we would break the curse of katti. Avi used to take batti when she was told to hide instead of seek. Stuti, I and Annie were like 3 idiots during childhood. So the system was that when Annie spent more time with Stuti, I’d take katti. When Annie would spend more time with me, Stuti would take katti. And when Stuti spent more time with me, Annie would take katti. So due to this system, it was really rare that all of us took batti.

5)    Stage 5: Always!- This stage comes after a series of katti-batti incidents, introduction to new friends, etc. If you can survive all the previous stages various times, you reach this stage. This is a stage of true friendship which will last forever, how much ever we fight, we remain friends forever.

I hope you enjoyed this article and could relate to all the stages. I am sure you must have experienced them.

Queens of India

Our sex ratio is 943 per 1000 females. We usually love to gossip, follow the latest fashion trends and use make up. We strive for independence. Our world is limited to the house. There we are! The women of this cultured country, striving to break this society and enter one of liberty and happiness.

The saying ‘unity in diversity’ definitely hold true for our country. The way our country is diverse, even the women of our country are. So, let’s discover this diversity among Indian women today:

1)    Speed Post:  The world knows them, but they know the world better. Gossip is their soul. Gossip, apart from daily soaps, is a vital source of Vitamin E (entertainment) for them. Even when they are away on a tour, they make it their business to poke their nose in other’s business. They add extra mirch-masala to the gossip. They gossip about everything; T.V. serials, their daughter-in-laws, others daughter-in-laws, how short random people’s skirts are, about aaj kal ki ladkiyan etc. They have this typical tone of talking, with stressing on specific words. They talk nonsense at time and could be irritating at times as well.

2)    Baby Lips: Beauty is their life and make up their occupation. They have lipstick, eyeliner, blush, lip gloss, eye shadow, lip liner, mascara and a lot more on their faces even when they go for a morning walk or even when they go to drop their kids to school. They are more made up than the actresses on daily soaps. Their stock of makeup is never-ending and perhaps more than that in a makeup store. They have a perception that makeup makes you beautiful. So they fill their faces with makeup and wait to look beautiful.

3)    Om Jai Jagdish Hare: Pooja path is what they love. They are the ones who keep upvaas and are devoted to God all the time. They usually do not eat non-veg food. They fast almost every day. Their devotion towards the Almighty is in the form of Bhajan every day, with a pooja ki thali in their hands. Their house will usually have a huge temple. A pandit will be called monthly, and a regular puja will be done on a regular basis. All sorts of bhajans are known to them. They do not come near God with their chappals on or without bathing. A lot of women under this category are senior citizens. They are Bhagvan ki bhakti mein doobi hui.

4)    Womeedrom: ‘Womeendrom’ is basically a combination of ‘women’ and ‘freedom’. So these are the free women of India. They strive to make a change, aspire to establish equality and break societal norms. They wear short clothes, are independent. They contribute to the Gross Domestic Product. Sometimes, they are paid less than men, but their dedication is way more than men. The Indian society condemns them, but they don’t really care. All they care about is their goal. They do all that men do. It isn’t essential that they are good at cooking or other household chores for that matter. When the society back-bitches about them, they just let out a smile. I love this category and aspire to be a part of it.

5)    Silent sufferers: Women suffer a lot. Be it stereotypes, discrimination, sexual harassment, social taboos, human trafficking, eve teasing, ragging, family pressure, society pressure, dowry, domestic violence, child marriage, female infanticide, bride burning, women are victims of everything. The women in this category face it all, but emerge as winners. They suffer silently. They are undoubtedly the bravest.